I made a point in this website to address the most common reason why people don’t seek help—they don’t believe that counseling will be effective.
Well, the good news is that 40 years of research back up that counseling is more effective than not for 80% of people who try it. Research has consistently provided a strong basis for getting professional help. Unfortunately, the popular stereotype of therapists and therapy do not reflect this data and it is not widely known. I want to help change that.
I made the statement earlier on, that I am happy to work with spouses alone in counseling, if their partner will not come in. That said, I still would like to encourage you to come in for several reasons:
- If I work for an extended period of time with your spouse and you change your mind and later wish to join us, it may be awkward for you and you may fear that my previous bond with your partner might disrupt the three of us working together. If we start now, all together, we avoid that problem.
- Having your perspective during the assessment phase is invaluable. Only you can truly represent yourself. By hearing from you and seeing the two of you interact, I will learn volumes about how I can best be of help to the relationship.
- If you are not sure what your goal is for the relationship i.e. reconciliation or possibly divorce, etc., I will help you talk through your concerns either way. My own philosophy is that I do not give clients recommendations on who to marry or whether to get or stay married. In my opinion, that is inappropriate. I want you to feel free to communicate your needs and desire either way or I consider it my job to support you to do so. My agenda is your agenda.